AAAAAHHHHHGGGGG!!!!!

If someone screams in cyber space, does anyone here it??
Sorry, had to get that out - cause I am sitting in the extremely quiet staff room and I want to scream, or sing out loud or just talk to someone!!!! Obviously, these people would think I am even crazier then I appear if I started doing the above - so I must do it here. Then again - there aren't that many people here - so perhaps it wouldn't matter. This week has been rough - on the motivation front - no kids, no established English teachers, no direction....

OH GOD - I am losing it! Now I can't look at the guy across from me with out laughing. I am heading to Mystery Science Theater 3ooo (MST3) mode - making up my own dialogue in my head.

Okay, yet another disturbing discovery today: I am turning into a dirty old spinster! 15 minutes ago it was just me and three of the better looking male teachers in the staff room and as this is a PG rated blog I cannot tell you where my mind started to wander (O_o). Jess, I may actually have one of those stories you keep telling me to write - LOL. I swear to Buddha, it's getting to the point were, when I look at some of this guys, they turn into a big piece of steak (or Arby's roast beef sandwich) on a plate - just like in the Looney Toons cartoons!!!! This cannot be good (,_,). But what is one to do when all the JET boys are either to young, attached, or gay and the Japanese are probably afraid I would crush them to death - LOL. All I am left is my imagination and my feeble, embarrassing attempts at female flirtation with my co-workers (which they are very good at avoiding). It's all quite depressing if you think about it!

And in this present state of mind + MST3 mode, I have to go to a party with these people and drink copious amounts of alcohol! Perhaps I could seal my status as dirty old spinster by taking advantage of one of my poor drunken teachers tonight - LOL - AS IF! I'll say this much - I am much more exciting in my mind then real life - eheheh. But then, aren't we all??

I Feel the Earth Move...

Two earth moving events this weekend.
First, there was an earthquake in my neck of Japan. As luck would have it I had just gotten out of bed to visit the commode when my apartment started to shake so I didn't sleep through this one. I made a dash for one of my shelves and managed to save nothing from falling. Luckily, nothing was broken (I may move my laptop out of the path of falling glass from now on). Then it was over! I went back to bed. Felt one small after shock later. Got an email from one of the Japanese teachers at school - guess a shaking of this magnitude is pretty rare in Yatsuo. The only news story I could find was out of China - click here to read. Shout out to Trevor for sending an email to check on me!

Second earth moving event, the Bubster is coming to Japan!!! While researching possible ways to get off this rock for Golden Week, I discovered that my FF miles were worthless to leave, but not to get here. So in a matter of 24 hours, we had Dad booked on a flight to the land of the rising sun! Of course, once the deed was done, I started worrying about what to do with my dad in Japan for 6 days - LOL. But upon further reflection - I am sure I can find something to amuse him! Karaoke, tempura shrimp, and Asahi!!!! So now Golden Week will be golden and sunny with the Bubster in the house!

Another productive result from this FF mile search - I have found some tickets to Singapore and South Korea this fall - so the travel bug that I thought was in hibernation, has reared it's head again! Let the fun begin!

Sayonara Senseis

Well, today each of the teachers got called to the principle's office and told where they will be working for the next year. The sad result of these meeting is that my supervisor at Yatsuo will not be here next year. I was BUMMED when she told me. On top of that, my favorite office lady (the one who looks out for me) is also leaving. And she just started to figure out my eating habits (no tomatoes, extra meatloaf paddies).
Some of the teachers looked really sad and there was a lot of whispering going on. I wasn't invited to the meeting so I am not sure of the final results for everyone. But there is a farewell party next Friday - so I guess I just wait till then. Then we can all get trashed and say "Sayonara".
Today was also closing ceremony for the school year. More speeches in Japanese, more bowing, more singing. The temp teachers that are leaving gave a speech, got a bouquet of flowers and escorted from the gym. The rest of us got to freeze our hineys off for a few more speeches and awards. After that, it was cleaning time! And today I actually saw kids cleaning!!! Hanging out windows and what not. We had the largest dust pile I've yet to see in the teacher's room - its was amazing (*-*). Of course the kids didn't just go home after this to enjoy their spring break - because club activities never stop! They'll be back during the break for a few hours each day too. No rest for the wicked or a Japanese student!

Somebody's Watching Me..

"It always feels like some body's watching me....."
There are many a JET/foreigner here that complain about getting stared at and how rude that is, why don't people stop it, blah, blah, blah. To which i say - you are a red M&M in a sea of green - of course people are going to stare! We are DIFFERENT for pete's sake! I personally embrace my 'uniqueness' and run with it. I am sure my sometimes wacky head wear only make it more fun for those who care to take a glance. I've yet to feel a sense of paranoia while out walking or hanging out at Favore. Hell if anything I am the one staring at all the cute babies this country produces!
There is one thing though that induces the paranoia bug in me (I think I've mentioned this before, but it bugs me enough to repeat it) - when they talk about me at school. It drives me CRAZY. Cause I KNOW they are talking about me - they say my damn name "Danielle-san"! Today, for instance I was the subject of a conversation between my supervisor and vice-principle, there was paperwork involved and at one point my sup was counting my days worked in the attendance book (I have NO idea why). And this all took place not 10 feet from my desk. Being the innate worry wart that I am - I can't have people discussing me - cause my mind immediately jumps to the wrong place: Maybe they discovered where I hid the bodies; Maybe I 'shouldn't' use the computer so much; Did I forget to sweep under a desk??;Have they FINALLY discovered what a slacker I am? AGGHHHHHH.

Mom says this is an excellent reason to learn the language - except I am starting to think these people speak in code - so much can be said with SOOOOO little around here. Hai, Hai, Danielle-san, hai, wakarimashita, hai, domo, wakarimashita, hai. Means: Yes she is a slacker. Yes, I've had her house bugged. Danielle-san will be watched. I understand. Yes, we can have her taken care of. Thank you for your approval. I understand. Yes, lunch tomorrow would be wonderful.

Ja ne!

Life of a Teacher

Let me, for a moment, enlighten you on the life of a Junior High School teacher. If this is what it's like in America - I don't know if I'd sign on.

1. They "work" at least 9 hours a day. I say "work" cause they definitely have some down time while they are in the office (bit like work at home, that).
2. All are assigned to a club and must accompany that club to events - including events on weekends and holidays.
3. Extra curricular activities - i.e. enkais. These aren't mandatory or cheap. But with the group mentality - many teachers go. These things run anywhere between 4000 - 9000 each time and there are at least 5 big ones a year. That doesn't include the 2nd enkai that many teachers go to. There are also things like lunches for special events -i.e. graduation lunch and closing ceremony lunch. They cost me 2500 - making me wish there was less raw fish in them!
4. They work year round - except for public holidays and 5 days at Christmas.
5. They work for the Board of Ed - which means they can be moved around. Some of my teachers will be leaving Yatsuo for other JHS and we'll be getting some fresh blood. Not sure what the rhyme or reason for this is, but I've heard no one usually stays at one school for longer then 4 years.

Okay - really, looking at this list, with the exception of #3, their working conditions mirror most of our white collar workers in America. As I am not sure about teachers - it could be the same as them too - except for #4 - American teachers definitely get more vacation then these guys.

We'll all be hanging out together next week during spring break - them doing whatever it is they do to prepare for the new year and me bored out of my mind! Let the fun begin!

Don't Get Mad

"Don't Get Mad" This is what one of my ichi-nensei boys said to me today. This was followed by him shouting, "You're an IDIOT" and a mad dash to get away from me. I used to like this boy - but I am starting to question my decision.

Seriously, as I've never really hung out with 12 year old boys, I am not sure if their behavior is quite normal. Our language barrier only makes the task more humorous.

Take this for example: I was thumb-wrestling with one of my favorite dysfunctional students (seriously, this kid crawls on me and likes to hit me in the head with my own hand), and when I started to win - he tried to lick my hand (O-o). At the same time he made some comment that had "idiot" boy from above laughing while rolling on the ground. As I know "idiot" boy is pretty good with the mother tongue - I harassed him for the translation of this "funny" word. Apparently monkey boy said I had a big chest. Ah so! A true statement, but not necessarily one that I would imagine to inspire hysterical laughter. This kids get grouped with that kid that keeps calling me "big" and telling me to "go to hell" - I tell him to be careful or I might sit on him \(*O*)/! And the ones who ask me if I have a penis, if I like penis, etc... You get that line of questioning!

But then there are the super cute ones that come up to me and apologize for guessing that my age is 44 (WTF - kids, I wouldn't be a JET if I was that old) or that I am older than Johnny Depp (he's 43 for cripes sake!). And the ones that like talking to me to tell me that their friend is smart because he lives in the library or he's handsome (which they ALWAYS deny - as if it's a bad thing).

LOL\(^-^)/ The future of Japan!

March Madness

BT - you requested a post. So here are some random thoughts for the general population to ignore (^0^)b

• I got a new rug for the bathroom - a 'kawaii' frog head - awwwhhhh (^.^)
• I got cookies for White Day from the teachers at school - the packaging is beautiful, the cookies - so so. (Valentine's Day - girls give boys sweets. White Day - boys give girls sweets).
• I hate, I mean really hate, washing dishes!
• I would have traded one of students today for some ButterBuds for my rice.
• I love reading other JETs blogs - it's so funny to read a different perspective on the situations happening to me.
• Seaseme salad dressing is delicious.
• Charity show rehersals are moving to Takaoka (30min by car) and to that I say - BALLS! That sucks!

And the best of all:

• My movie "director" wants me to learn to sing Mariah Carey and Celine Dion - LOL. I think most of you can imagine how that is going to turn out!

Sorry this post is so boring - I'll strive to do something more exciting to post soon.

It’s not Goodbye, it’s Sayonara!

But in the end they mean the same thing!

Today was graduation for all for my junior high 9th graders. As it is still impossible for me to be in two places at once, I had to miss out on Sugihara’s big day. I did get to sit thru their rehearsal though – two hours of freezing my ass of, not understanding anything but the word “minnasan” (everyone), and snapping photos. These kids could give my Rainbow girls a lesson in squaring their corners! SHARP (^O^)b Anyhoo, today’s official ceremony at Yatuso pretty much matched what I saw yesterday, except today we had to actually sit thru the speeches. Except for all the bowing and singing, the ceremony itself is on par with our American ceremonies. No caps or gowns though. The one thing they did that I really liked was when the kids actually left. After the ceremony, we all gathered outside – teachers, parents, students – and they played auld lange syne and we clapped as the san-nensei left school. It was very, very nice and, as I am a watering pot, I cried. I also cried yesterday when the students presented all the teachers with a card containing messages from the students. I did NOT cry when, during a quiz, the students asked “Which teacher looks the most like an Anime (cartoon) character?" and I was the correct answer (O-o).

So in all this hoopla, I’ve realized that I do NOT like goodbyes. Take for instance the 500 different times I said good-bye before I left for this adventure. I mean really, I cried today for kids I don’t even really know. The fact is they were sad, so I was sad for them, because I think goodbyes suck. I know someone will say, “It’s not goodbye, it’s until we meet again” – but to that I say bullshit! When you say goodbye, there is defiantly something that will get left behind, be it a friend, or a place or a feeling. And, in reflecting on this fact, I’ve come to the conclusion that I don’t like leaving that “something” behind. I’ve had so many great experiences/travels where I’ve met great people, but once we say goodbye, that’s it – they are gone, never to be seen or heard from again. OF COURSE, don’t get me wrong, I am by no means perfect, and in the end I really have no problem leaving most of these people/situations/feelings behind. But when I am ‘in’ the moment – it sucks.

I am the ultimate romantic, I want the ultimate happy ending, and in happy endings – no one says goodbye. I can back this personality trait up with the books I read, the movies I watch, and the songs I listen too (LORD, I was making a CD for one of my students and looking at my iTunes and thought – DAMN – I got some seriously EMO music on this thing). A therapist might say it’s rooted in my fear of being alone – and to that I say – sure, makes sense. This recent discover also sheds some light on some other issues I’ve been having. Not that I am going to turn over a new leaf tomorrow, but self-awareness can’t be a bad thing. Who’d thunk that my Japanese experience would be so enlightening??

Just Say Snow!!

Well, this weekend was another failed attempt at attending a snow festival in Toyama. This time I actually managed to find the place, BUT there was no fish bowl stew, snow games or log ridding. Just an empty parking lot in the middle of what was turning out to be a pretty heavy snow storm. As luck would have it, Tiffany and Mallorie joined me for this adventure - so it was actually pretty fun. At one point Tiffany said "If this road gets any steeper, we may want to start telling how much we appreciate each other" and as we approached the ski resort "You know, this is how alot of horror movies start." She had a point - the snow was getting pretty heavy, we were the only car on the road, and the ski resort looked a bit like a factory. The beware of bears sign added that special little touch. The silver lining of this story is we didn't die in the snow and we ended up at a cozy little Indian resturant with delish food.
It was a nice ending to a very relaxing weekend of: laundry; awkward,interesting lunches; clay doll painting; and movies at my pad!

There are just no words....

I may have mentioned this before, but an acquaintance of mine is a budding movie director and I've volunteered to assist with his first film. Yesterday, he shot a very short video of me looking at a plant.(My head is cut off, cause he is shorter than me, so the camera wasn't positioned right - but other then that - it's oscar worthy.) I also had to send him some headshot so he could morph my head onto some possible costume choices. The one I had seen was a picture of a very holy looking virgin mary. Apparantly that costume has been scraped and I'll now be wearing the below outfit.

Awestruck aren't you. I know I was (O_O)!! Should be interesting.

Mono ga suki desu

I was thinking about some of the things that made me happy and chuckle today:

1. That my students are color-coded by their tennis shoes.
2. That there is an ACO type store in my city - it even smells the same! I can get a screwdriver, a blue jumpsuit, an orange tree and tea at the same place.
3. That the weather can't decide if it wants to be snow or rain.
4. That I have a car - so it doesn't matter if it is snowing or raining.
5. That no matter how much I sweep - the dust never goes away! Like a good friend.
6. Free mochi covered strawberry treats from the cake lady at Orange Mart.
7. The wacky sense of humor of my Yatsuo buddy, our "deep" discussions over drying laundry and our impromptu kanji lessons.
8. That my mom will call if she can't find me.
9. That two of my JH students emailed me (n_n) - yeah, I AM a "cool" teacher.
10. Taking a nap after school! Oh, the joys of burrowing under a pile of super-soft blankets at 4:15 in the PM (~.~).
11. IMing with my bestest friend in the whole universe. Apparantly a rum and coke really can cure a cold! Hope that naked bungee-jumping bibliography thingee worked out for you!

I've left off the obvious things like family, being alive, etc. But those are a given!

So what makes you happy?

One Complicated Payment

Quote of the Day:
“I'm sick of following my dreams. I'm just going to ask them where they're going and hook up with them later.” Mitch Hedberg

This quote kinda gels with the jumble of thoughts that have been running thru my head lately. I’ve been in Japan for 212 days now and I am LOVING IT. I’ll be driving around and it’ll hit me “I am living and working IN a foreign country”. And there is something very peaceful about this place, Japan. I feel calm and content here. I have no real desire to return to Michigan. I’ve even been pondering the idea of staying for a third year (way to early to think about that). The problem lies in the fact that at some point I do have to leave and then the dream is over! Now the extreme optimists out there are probably saying “You’ll find another ‘dream’”. But I’ve wanted this one for so long that I don’t really have any backup plan and I think I am going to be really really depressed when I get back home. Therefore, the goal is to find a way to circumvent that outcome. Well, I have no answers now – and truthfully – this is just word vomit!

So here is another funny from Mitch:

“I saw a product on late night tv. It said, you can water your hard-to-reach plants with this product. Who the f*ck would make their plants hard to reach?! I know you need water, but I'm gonna make you hard to reach. I will throw water at you. Hopefully they invent a product before you shrivel and die. And they said, you can have this product for four easy payments of $19.95. I would like to see a product that was available for three easy payments, and one f*ckin' complicated payment. We ain't gonna tell you which one it is, but one of these payments is gonna be a bitch: the mailman will get shot to death, the envelope will not seal, and the stamps will be in the wrong denomination...Good luck f*cker! The last payment must be made in wompum!”